i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
It's like God shit irony all over that family
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
