i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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