omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
