I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I have fence marks all over my body
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
