hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
