Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Randomize
