Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Randomize
