Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize