Dual....:-)
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
