how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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