She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
