does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Let's get the cat blown out
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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