This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Randomize
