I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
