I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I want to be your penis for a week.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
