frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
