we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
