Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
