Me. At least after what I've been through.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize
