We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Randomize