Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
