My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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