im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Randomize
