Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
