I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
