can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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