Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I think your dad took our porno
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
