i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Randomize
