I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
It was like getting head from an anaconda
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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