she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
