hotel room ftw
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
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weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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