i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
