If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
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