going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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