I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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