Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
