Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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