Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
you would pick up someone in the library
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Gay?
German.
Pity.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize