Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
