he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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