He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
