Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
false alarm. still invincible.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
The power of my boobs compel you
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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