Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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