My hand turned me down
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize
