Got a toothbrush?
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner