She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
