Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
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