I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Randomize
