Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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