Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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