he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize